The Soup Paradigm

So recently I had surgery and as a result I am not allowed to eat anything with even the smallest amount of fat. However I am naturally a very, very small and very, very skinny person so whenever I go to the supermarket or a restaurant and ask for the lowest fat options I get some very strange looks akin to this.                     

 <- strange look

And so after much thought I decided to make some delicious soup. Or rather to get my mother to do it for me...
With lots of healthy vegetables and boiled meats it would be a perfect and tasty meal.

But my joy was not to last.

The microwave.....
was dead.

I instantly could feel myself sinking into the metaphorical abyss of despair. I yearned for soup! I needed it, I required it!

But cooktop was there to save the day. Using it's vassal, small saucepan, I reheated the soup, BUT EVEN COOKTOP WAS PLOTTING AGAINST ME. The soup was burnt.
And yet I could not give up hope. With a stubbornness born from what can only be the will to live I bravely bent over the soup, sinking my spoon into it's depths to retrieve what little nutrients remained in it's burnt chunky goodness.
But the universe was cursing me yet, stealing away my eyesight with cunning trickery concocted from soup steam...

And so, blinded and without nourishment, on a dreary winters day I was unable to warm myself with tasty soup. And so I crawled up, fetal and blue.
The end.

 

DAMN YOU MICROWAVE. DAMN YOU.